Many thanks to Zenobia Renquist for this fun Friday Flash premise, posted on the Changeling Press Yahoo site. ***Every doorway in your house leads to a different time or a different dimension and you really, really, REALLY need to get to your bathroom. ***
I crawled wearily out of bed, my full bladder dragging me from sleep. Plodding to the bathroom I ran up against a closed door. “What the hell…?” I grasped the handle and screamed as heat seared my palm. Dragging my sleeve over my hand I grabbed the handle and turned it, fast.
Flames shot from the floor and danced on the air, coloring the fixtures in my bathroom in vibrant orange and red.
“Hey there,” said a husky voice.
My gaze shot to the toilet, where a sexy, naked demon sat, a New York Times clutched in his big hands. “I’ll be done in a minute.”
Squealing, I slammed the door shut and moon-walked to the hall bathroom. I’d deal with the demon on the toilet later.
The door to the hallway bath was closed too. I frowned, tentatively touching the handle to make sure it wasn’t hot. The door opened without mishap. But a white mist wafted out, sending the smell of Ozone into my face. Hopping on one foot, I peered through the fog. “Who’s in there?”
The shower door opened and ahandsome face popped out. Wide, blue eyes blinked at me and a soggy wing drifted through the opening before the angel yanked it back. “Oh, sorry. Do you need to get in here?”
I hopped again, my hands diving down to cup my groin. “Um…Yeah.”
The angel turned the water off. “Can you hand me my halo, over there?”
Something in the blue gaze warned me. A devious light flared and the perfect, square jaw tightened slightly.
“I shook my head. I’m not coming in there.”
He cocked his golden head. “Don’t you have to pee?”
I backed away. “I’ll pee outside.”
Locks clicked all over the house and a terrifying awareness slammed through me. Trapped!
The angel shrugged. “Sorry. I guess you’re gonna have to choose…your bladder or your soul.”
A deep voice called to me from my bedroom. “Bathroom’s free.”
I looked from the devious angel’s face, to the flickering orange light coming from my bedroom, thinking fast. Finally I shrugged and slammed the door. I’d just pee on the flames in my bathroom and call it a day.
Problem solved. Maybe the sexy demon would like to try out my new mattress with me.
Have a great weekend, everybody!